6.19.2012

Waiting and A Trail of Thoughts

I hate waiting. 
I hate waiting in lines.
I hate waiting at stop lights. 
I hate waiting for Christmas morning.
And I hate waiting to hear potentially big news. 

Because of this, I don't really like surprises or keeping secrets either. I especially hate knowing that there is a surprise coming.  Pure agony. That is why I have been so quiet these last couple weeks (oh and I have hardly had time to breathe between emergencies, too much car travel, vacation, overtime at work, stress and just plain being exhausted). I am waiting, with as much patience as I can muster, to share the things that are going on in my life with you all! 

It's true, I am not that good at keeping my own secrets.  Hello, I share my most embarrassing moments with the world!  I am like a steel trap when it comes to keeping other people's secrets, but when it comes to by own, I just want to share!  In high school, I always told boys that I had a crush on them. I often tell people what I got them as a gift before they open it. Worst of all, I regularly just say whatever I am thinking (insert foot in mouth).  I have mentioned I have some big things in the works.  REALLY BIG things. I just don't want to talk about them and jinx anything.  It has been really hard for me!  Really hard! I just want to type everything that has been going on and what I think about it. But, I really want things to work out.  When I finally have definite answers I will hopefully share some fan-FREAKING-tastic news with everyone!

In the meantime, I am just going to keep thinking happy thoughts and hope that the reason I have had to wait so long is because what I am waiting for is totally worth the wait!  Let's just say, if my life were a game of Chutes and Ladders, I am a couple spaces away from the really big ladder, I just have to be careful I don't fall short and take a chute back a level.  Cryptic enough?



That brings me to another thought.  Everything happens for a reason.  I have always believed this to be true, but something happened about a week ago that renewed my conviction.  It didn't happen to me, so it is not my story to share. Let's just say, I am thankful on so many levels that it happened and that everything turned out how it did.  Sometimes wake-up calls come in painful forms, but they make things better in the long run. 

Sometimes things happen, and there is no eloquent way to say this, but those things really suck!  A lot of the time it takes some time for the things we see as life's troubles to reveal their positive aftershock.  Sometimes, it just takes a few hours.  Either way, I feel very strongly, that everything happens for a reason.  Even the worst situations. 

Which brings me to another thought.  Life is short. Live it.  Don't waste a moment.  You don't know how many moments you have.  Live every day to the fullest and create your best life.  Go for your dreams and don't waste a second on regret. 

That's what I have to say for today.  Don't worry, I'll just be here... waiting.

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